Contractor Overseeing Sensitive Government Docs in ‘Cave’ Accused of Having Major Case of TDS

As if witnessing the attempted assassination of Donald Trump at the Butler rally last summer wasn’t horrifying enough, a Pennsylvania man lost his job over it. And his firing may have to do with a severe case of Trump Derangement Syndrome.

Clarence Stamm was among the hundreds of rally-goers who stood in 90º heat last summer while waiting for Donald Trump’s speech in Butler, Pa. Thankfully, he brought along a sun visor that his employer, Iron Mountain, gave employees to wear around town and at events. 

It was in Butler on that Saturday that Stamm was among the Trump supporters who witnessed the candidate and others get shot by an assassin. 

During the week, Stamm worked in the now infamous “cave” that Elon Musk and his DOGE team would later shake their heads over. The DOGE team was stunned to discover that the cave contained the paper retirement and other sensitive vital records for hundreds of thousands of Americans. The sensitive site also reportedly contains National Archives records.

The operation opened in the 1970s, but you’ll recall that Musk said the technology was straight out of the 1950s. He and his team have been upgrading and updating the computer programs since he found “the cave.” 

The old limestone cave, called the Boyers Facility, is where the contractor, Iron Mountain, keeps the Office of Personnel Management records 230 feet underground.

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Author: HP McLovincraft

Seeker of rabbit holes. Pessimist. Libertine. Contrarian. Your huckleberry. Possibly true tales of sanity-blasting horror also known as abject reality. Prepare yourself. Veteran of a thousand psychic wars. I have seen the fnords. Deplatformed on Tumblr and Twitter.

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