Don’t Forget To Claim Drug Dealing Income on Your Taxes

As just about every American adult knows and is dreading, Monday, April 15, is Tax Day. Each year, taxpayers scrounge together each income statement the government requires and any random receipt that may result in a modest deduction in the amount they’re expected to pay.

The IRS wants taxpayers to know that if you made money from anything illegal last year—stealing, selling illegal drugs, taking bribes—then that’s taxable, too.

Last year, Americans spent 6.5 billion hours doing their taxes, which translates to roughly $260 billion in lost productivity. That’s in addition to the $104 billion they spent in direct costs on the actual tax filing and preparation.

Much of that complexity stems from the amount of deductions and carve-outs the tax law allows, as well as the types of revenue required to be treated as taxable income.

IRS Publication 17 “covers the general rules for filing a federal income tax return.” In its most current edition, the IRS advises, “Income from illegal activities, such as money from dealing illegal drugs, must be included in your income on Schedule 1 (Form 1040), line 8z, or on Schedule C (Form 1040) if from your self-employment activity.”

In other words, even if you engage in activity that the federal government is completely opposed to, like selling heroin on the corner, Uncle Sam still expects you to kick up a percentage.

The IRS advisory also includes a section about “stolen property,” which similarly cautions, “If you steal property, you must report its fair market value in your income in the year you steal it unless you return it to its rightful owner in the same year.”

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Author: HP McLovincraft

Seeker of rabbit holes. Pessimist. Libertine. Contrarian. Your huckleberry. Possibly true tales of sanity-blasting horror also known as abject reality. Prepare yourself. Veteran of a thousand psychic wars. I have seen the fnords. Deplatformed on Tumblr and Twitter.

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